With the ultimate conflicts making their way to the comic film, from the Hulk coming to blows in the Avengers: Age Of Ultron trailers, to the cleverly entitled film Batman V. Superman: Dawn Of Justice, we understand the cathartic need for heroes to punch it out among themselves now and again. Not that they are bad guys, sometimes it’s just a slight difference in opinion that needs a bit of kneeding out. You know. With their fists.
Others are pure enemies, plain and simple. Differences just have to hash out their differences.
Some will be like watching a bizarre supernatural documentary of gods in their (un)natural habitat, others will have a more David / Goliath feel. In any case, wherever possible, we would love to see these face-offs happen on screen. To the degree of damage, whether severely bruised egos or near fatalities, we are not too bothered.
(10) Robin vs. Slade
The Boy Wonder has white hot hate for the ever-elusive one-eyeed criminal mastermind Slade. And despite all the phallic and homoerotic references to their adversarial relationship online, it’s safe to say Slade is Dick’s Moby Dick. Wow, lot of penis references in the breakdown. But all penis jokes aside, Robin is near obsessed with capturing Slade to the point of compromising his morals and standing. Hopefully we’ll get to see this dynamic in the Titans upcoming live-action series.
(9) Daredevil vs. Wilson “Kingpin” Fisk
Okay, I know what you are thinking. That Daredevil feature film was just supers. But we wouldn’t mind seeing Marvel take another whack at the Daredevil franchise. Netflix may just be on the case, getting Law and Order’s Vincent D’Onofrio to play the criminal mastermind. But don’t stress over Fisk’s apparent weight problem cause he’s more muscle than anything, and a bit of a martial art specialist. Daredevil is Marvel’s chief Knight (like DC’s Batman) but he has yet to be realised in a loving light cinematically-speaking, so hopefully the upcoming Daredevil series will bring these two to a climatic face-off of epic proportions.
(8) Iron Man vs. Captain America
Well it seems this one is already on the slates with Civil War’s narrative arc making its way to our screens under the filmic umbrella of Captain America 3. Iron Man, aka Tony Stark, is a privileged playboy billionaire who doesn’t mind the draconian measures being implemented by the US to keep track of mutants and superheroes. The Cap aka Steve Rogers is the ‘roided soldier from the 40’s who believes in preserving the right and privacy of fellow heroes. Great, already a rift. So all we need is for Tony to feel how honest, hard working hands balled into a fist feels like. And Iron Man can teach the Captain… well… how to overcome alcoholism and pay billions of great US Dollars for a exoskeleton armour suit that will do extensive damage just by a mere thought or blink of an eyelid. God bless HUD. And Jarvis.
(7) Wonder Woman vs. Ares
All hot chicks have daddy issues. Particularly if you father happens to be the god of war. It also doesn’t help Ares wants to destroy all deities in order to erect himself as omnipotent ruler of all things. Now that explains Princess Diana’s hot temper and being at ease on the battlefield.
Being a woman who prides her sensibilities on being strong with feminist tendencies may understandably come to hate the god she feels is the embodiment of male dominance and patriarchal oppression. What a way to project all that internal hate Diana. She’s the ultimate psychologist’s day dream. Literally and figuratively.
(6) Superman vs. Darkseid
Superman does not have much family. So when the despot warlord Darkseid of an alien hell-pit planet called Apokolips, a planet Hitler himself would be afraid to step foot on, takes it on himself to recruit your only cousin Supergirl into his ranks? I mean, you’d probably would get a bit upset. We suspect it is similar to finding out that your little sister is working at a titty bar you frequent. And seeing there is no love loss between the Man Of Steel and the undergod that shoots Omega beam rays from his eyes that track and incinerate all that fall before it, a punch-up between these powerhouses would be one for the record books.
(5) Wolverine vs. Hulk
Marvel’s pigheaded, more animal-than-man, juggernauts of feral, primal animal instincts seethe with rage every time they cross paths. The jolly mean giant gets more powerful the angrier he gets, and Logan, despite his size is a ball of fury that can take it as hard as he can give it. Preferably to take place in a snow-laden woodland, we expect a lot of angry animal snarling and fighters going apesh*t.
(4) Spiderman vs. Venom
After Marvel ending a mediocre Spiderman trilogy with a dancing Peter Parker and a Venom that was disturbingly non-impactful, we hope the next Spiderman title Sony and Marvel churn out will do the Symbiote and its host some filmic justice. The dichotomy that Venom completes in this rivalry proves to give us a physical representation of Peter Parker’s own internal conflict, and the need to suppress all that is of darkness. So we need to see true conflict, a Spiderman dwarfed in size in relation to Venom, and the lengths he has to go to to overcome should be at a high cost. Pyrrhic victories are always the outcome when dealing with internal conflict of this magnitude. An most importantly, get the transformation and back hand web slinging right. Think thicker, more gross and phlegmatic.
(3) Batman vs. Justice League
Batman has trust issues. Which is odd that he’d assembled the Justice League, a powder keg of near omni-potent aliens and metahumans with the collective power to potentially destroy worlds if they ever journeyed to the dark side. It is only appropriate Batman would anticipate every possible outcome, particularly if the JLA got too unwieldy a group. So Batman puts his strategy cowl on and deciphered a way to dismantle and pacify all members of the Justice League with strategic targeting of each members individual weaknesses.
(2) Superman vs. Batman
LEGO Batman 3: Beyond Gotham game shows a way-too-familiar Superman being all high and mighty in space talking about Batman being all “brooding”, whilst breathing space air and sh*t. This is, of course, a friendlier interpretation of the relationship between the Dark Crusader and the Last Son of Krypton. Dawn Of Justice has pretty much put forward what to expect re: the confrontation of these two titans, but what will the fight be like? Frank Miller’s Dark Knight Returns? Obviously to be a fair enough of a (physical) fight, Batman’d have to armour up, or at least employ some help and that infamous detective strategy. Superman we guess would try to restrain from any hard attacks, but we suspect for someone who gets continuously showered with praise will have his ego and any hurt pride will takeover the best of him.
(1) Superman vs. Captain Marvel
Superman may be the boy scout, but Captain “Shazam” Marvel is Super Captain Boy Scout of all worlds ever. Captain Marvel’s morality compass tends to be uncompromising, while Superman has slightly grey areas, extremely rare but existent. Blow for blow, this fight would be superb and earth shattering. While Superman will effectively be trying to punch a child (who by the very word Shazam transforms into the omnipotent Captain Marvel), the magic Captain Marvel wields will prove to be a great obstacle for Superman, as Superman is particularly susceptible to anything more potent than street magic.
So there it is, the fights we want to see immortalised on film. Properly. So let’s hope the powers-that-be get their act together and make it happen. What are your top comic fights you want to see on film? Let us know in the comments. Or you could just hoard your ideas. Like a hoarder. Hoarder.